IT'S OK, HE'S FRIENDLY Read More

Imagine that I am walking down the street with my friend 'Bob'.  Bob spots you, a complete stranger, in the distance and without any warning he starts running up to you. 

I yell out "it's ok, he's friendly" 

What are you thinking at this moment?  

Do you even care that I'm yelling he is friendly?  Do you believe me?   Are you starting to worry for your safety, getting stressed and possibly fearful?  You are unsure of what is going to happen once Bob reaches you so are you getting ready to fight? 

Now Bob has reached you and he picks you up, swings you around and gives you big kiss on the lips.   I start to laugh and say "I'm sorry but he's just being friendly".

What is your reaction?                   

Well, that depends. 

Are you a very young child who has just been traumatized by a stranger?  Are you an elderly person who has just been physically injured by being picked up and swung around?  Are you an assault survivor who perceives this as an attack?  Are you recovering from Surgery and your recovery has been jeopardized?   Or did you think that it was a funny experience and you really didn't mind at all - it will be a funny story to tell at your next dinner party.

Different people have different perceptions and issues and will react differently.  

Bob has also put himself in an unknown situation that could result in injury to himself.   The father of the child could knock Bob to the ground and physically assault him,  the elderly or surgical people could sue him for physical damage, the prior assault victim could be prepared with pepper spray or some other means of self-defence.  Or Bob could face no consequences at all and as a result he will repeat the behavior again the next time he spots a stranger. 

Bob is playing Russian Roulette, because at some point he will meet up with someone who will not put up with his behavior, not find it friendly, and at that point Bob will personally suffer consequences which may be minor but could also be life-altering.

As a friend, it is safer and better for everyone (Bob included) that I stop him from disrespecting other people's personal space. I need to show him, in a positive manner,  more appropriate ways of interacting with strangers in public.  This may include learning how to ignore strangers and pass by them without any interaction at all.   

Bob needs to practice Good Manners in shared public spaces.